Running on Empty

We interrupt our scheduled wedding recap to bring you this: running has become hard. A three miler that would have been nothing a few months ago now involves walk breaks. I know my "speed" and stamina will come back but, damn, I didn't think I had reconditioned that badly. Ugh.

Wedding Recap Part I: Pre-Wedding

We made the smart decision to head down on Thursday instead of Friday which allowed us a little more time with a few out of town friends.  It also allowed us to relax a little before the big weekend shindig activities started.  It was funny because neither of us felt nervous at all at any point during the engagement.  That is until we took the exit for The Edgefield.  Both of us simultaneously started to get the nervous, butterfly thing going.  This big thing that we had been working on for so long was actually happening. 

The main thing we did Thursday was put together all the out of town gift bags.  In the spirit of being welcoming and inclusive we wanted to get everyone's weekend off on the right foot with a welcome bag to thank them for making the trip (since everyone had to travel to it).  They were filled with some fun tasty treats and give them a sense of what the vibe of the wedding would be like.  The black rabbit cookies with the story of the Edgefield black rabbit seemed to be a hit, the water bottles (with heavily borrowed from the interwebs "nutrition label") and everyone's own personal flying lemon magnet were our favorite things.  We didn't decide to do the out of town bags until about five weeks before the wedding so they created a bit of last minute work but it was worth it.  People seemed to enjoy going into their rooms and seeing their bright yellow welcome bag.

Prepping the bag for delivery

Friday Kevin and I had a couple's massage in the morning and then had some soaking pool time (to recreate our soaking pool engagement).  Later, I had my first manicure (meh, don't see the point to them) and pedicure (woo-hoo!  Those are great!).  My dear friend Michelle joined me for the pedicure and it was great to spend some more time catching up with her before all the craziness began.

Shortly after the relaxing spa treatments, the craziness did indeed begin.  Everyone started showing up and the fact that this was actually happening now became even more real.  Instead of a rehearsal dinner we had a 30 minute run-down with the wedding party about what was happening the next day and then we went to hang out by the Little Red Shed pub with a whole bunch of guests.  One of the advantages of a whole weekend deal instead of just the wedding on Saturday night is that we got more time to talk to our friends than you usually do at a wedding.  The day after brunch helped with that too.  However, I was nervous about how the next day would go and didn't enjoy myself a ton and just would have really rather been alone in the soaking pool.  Even with not feeling particularly social it was still a nice time though.  A group of our friends even showed up in their Edgefield bathrobes; they were truly getting into the spirit of the place.

Saturday morning was a quick breakfast where we barely ate (nerves again), a few times practicing dancing to our first dance song that lightened the mood immensely and took the worry out of us being able to remember any moves at all, and then off to the reception space for set-up.  I was only there for an hour before I had to leave for hair and make-up but I know this was hugely stressful for Kevin.  It was the fluffing and hanging of 80 tissue paper pom poms and a dozen flying lemons that really seemed to cause the kerfluffle.  They were a pain in the ass but boy did they help make that place festive.  He was so stressed about it that he actually had a nightmare the following night about the pom poms not being right.  Thanks to the previously mentioned wonderful friends it turned out beautifully and turned this



into something beautiful and happy and light that I don't have any good pictures of.  Maybe when the professional prints come in. 

The only glitch here other than the clusterf*#k that was the pom poms was I wanted bright yellow sashes for the chairs and got these soft butter yellow instead.  It turned out fine because one of the pom pom colors was the same yellow so all was good.  And at least the chair cover woman knew to not tie them into bows.  Even though I hate chair covers it was necessary for this space to make it lighter and more festive.  The chairs on their own are seriously ugly for a wedding.



Kevin's awesome flying lemons!



Michelle creating the flying lemon place cards.



I hated being away from the decorating.  This was our baby and we had worked so long and hard on it and I wanted to help make the vision a reality and it sucked to not be there.  Being a bit of a control freak it also stressed me out to leave it in other people's hands.  Luckily, Kevin knew exactly how it was supposed to look so I felt confident that it would come out pretty darn close to what we imagined.  I also wanted to do a quality control check/final run through when it was all done but there was no time for that. 

In the next installment:  with the set-up done it was time to meet for our "first look" and get the show on the road! 

Introducing Your New Superhero Duo......

.....Beluga Girl and Orca Boy!

Christ, we had a year engagement.  Shouldn't we have managed to be less porky by the time the wedding rolled around?

Wedding Recap In Which Very Little Wedding is Recapped

Where to begin, where to begin.  There is so much to say about the wedding that I didn't know where to start which is why I haven't posted anything yet.  I decided to break it down into four parts:  this post, pre-wedding, ceremony and reception.  I realize that this rehashing isn't going to be particularly interesting to anyone but me but since this is my, in the words of Mike Birbiglia, "secret public journal" I am going to do it anyway. 

Also, I am going to apologize in advance because I am going to do a lot of self-congratulating and patting us on the back in these posts.  We worked SO freaking hard on this wedding and worked on so many little details to have it turn out a certain way and to have it basically hit a home run on nearly every point feels amazing.  Sorry to be boastful but we both really feel that way which is good; it is how every couple should feel after their wedding.  We wanted the wedding to be joyous, celebratory, unique, inclusive, welcoming and most imporantly everything needed to be authentically "us".  We didn't want to be a wedding where you could throw in any couple into our roles and have it feel right.  I think we nailed those criteria.

Before I get too far into dissecting the weekend I do need to acknowledge that a lot of the weekend wouldn't have gone quite as well without the help of many, many friends.  Mike and Amber came over twice before the wedding to cut out lemon wings, bag earplugs and help with the Theo Chocolate favors.  My brother and his girlfriend Diane (that I had met only once before by the way) came over to make a zillion tissue paper pom poms and then Diane came over again two nights later to help me make and frost 90 black rabbit cookies for the gift bags.  All four of them also worked tirelessly on the day of the reception to help make the reception space look beautiful.  They were joined by so many others:  Michelle, best man Matt, Cherie, Todd, Patti, Paul, the whole Coocoochin clan, Kevin's co-worker Denise and her husband Curt.  I am certain I have missed someone and will feel like a jerk when it is pointed out so I apologize now for forgetting; the day was a blur.  It is just amazing how people jumped in to help.   Kevin and I kept commenting all weekend long and for many days afterwards how lucky we are to have such great friends. 

Next post:  actual wedding things discussed.  Maybe even a picture or two!

Home Stretch

Well, the big day is almost here.  I have a few moments while I am waiting for a computer process to run at work to muse on some things. 

First, this whole process has made me bipolar, I swear.  Between learning how to make me and my world views fit into bride and wife roles and planning a gigantic ass party I have been all over the map these past few months.  Some times I love it, other times I hate it, other times it is all sort of "meh".  It can vary from hour to hour or day to day. I am ready for life to get back to normal and all of the pressures (mostly self-made) can be off.   I never questioned my relatonship with Kevin but I have questioned the institution of marriage and the role of wife.   I have figured out how to make bride and wife fit for me and I am close to not thinking of the word "wife" as a swear word anymore.  Huge progress people.

I have also been made even more aware that there are two things that will set me off and get me out of balance and those are:  being tired for multiple days and being hungry.  I knew this about me before but these past few weeks have pounded that message home.  The mood has been dark and negative and that isn't normal for me.  I have been getting about 5-6 hours a night and for the last week, to fit into the damn dress, I haven't been eating much.  This combination makes for one unhappy and bitchy Ann-Marie.  Luckily we are almost done with tasks and we can head down to Portland tomorrow for some pre-wedding relaxation and SLEEP and I can get myself back to normal and enjoy the weekend.  Up until this morning I wasn't excited, I just wanted it to be over with.  I am now actually starting to feel excited and happy about our shindig. Finally feeling like I want to smile about it and am looking forward to it feels good.  I still think if you are looking at the whole thing with an objective eye that weddings are kind of ridiculous but I will revel in the ridiculousness of it all this weekend. 

Oh, and the dress fits again.  I am down just over six pounds in a week.  Hooray for quick water-weight loss!!!

Deep Weeds

Oh crap, oh crap, oh crap, oh crap, oh crap.  I'm getting married in eleven days and ........I don't fit into my wedding dress.  Not just a "oh, it's a bit too tight" or "it's slightly uncomfortable" or "I bulge a little there".  It is a I CAN'T EVEN ZIP IT UP!  I CAN'T HOOK THE TOP EYE!  Excuse my vulgarity internet but I am fucked.

The damn thing fit when I picked it up from the alterations lady a month ago but there wasn't much room for error (i.e. porking out).  What did I do?  I gained 7.5 lbs since I had it measured and fit five weeks ago (only 5.5 lbs since I picked it up) .  Yes, thank you, that is mad weight gaining skills.  At least I have mad skills at something.  Stupid tiredness and stress.

The weight I was at when I was fitted was one of those tipping point weights where just a two pound weight gain means all of my clothes fit differently.  That might sound ridiculous but it is really true.  This means that the 7.5 lbs feels like an extra 15 and totally alters the way all my clothes fit. 

I am taking the dress into her today to have them whisk it away for pressing/steaming.  Maybe I can see if she can do something. I am guessing not since she took in fabric to fit it to me and that probably doesn't leave anything to let out.  My other tactic is to do something I HATE and that is crash diet.   I don't think they are safe or effective in the long-term but this is the short term and if I blimp right back up on May 15th I can deal with that the real way (proper diet and exercise) then.  In the meantime I am resorting to South Beach because I know I can drop some quick pounds that way and hopefully not have to go out and buy another MF-ing dress.

Eugene Half-Marathon Walk Report

I decided to not push myself too much and only walk the half marathon instead of run/walking it. Since I was going to be walking Kevin decided to join me. The weather was perfect and we actually had some fun. I felt like a big ol' loser being with the walkers at first but I reminded myself that a 13 mile walk is still a good workout and to shut up and quit being a whiner. I kept thinking how this was supposed to be my inaugural marathon but in some ways I am glad it didn't turn out that way. The wedding planning has taken way more time than I imagined and I am not feeling good this weekend (rattley cough and chest congestion) which would have made running a half , let alone a full, challenging.

Oddly enough, walking felt harder on my muscles than running does. My quads feel trashed right now. In order to break up the walking monotony we decided to run at every mile marker for .20. This felt SO GOOD on my legs and back. Just switching up the muscle motion made a huge difference in how we felt.
We finished in 3:14 with a pace of 14:49. Not bad for a walking pace. Finish line pancakes were consumed, a good time was had by all. I would rather have been running it but at least I got to participate a little bit.