Sunday, August 22, 2010

Ugly Confession

I have a confession to make.  An embarrassing confession really.  Come, closer so I don't have to say it too loudly.  OK, here goes....My name is Ann-Marie and I enjoy wedding planning.  There I admitted it and said it to the world or at least my tiny corner of the interwebs.  I feel better now.  Admitting you have a problem is half the battle or something like that, right? 

Seriously, since the engagement I don't think a day has gone by that I have not looked at wedding ideas online or in a magazine or discussed them with Kevin.  Dang it but it's fun.  And the creativity people exhibit with their wedding planning blows me away.

Now before you worry too much and wonder what really happened to me I would like to point out that I have not become a white tulle obsessed Bridezilla dreaming of how she can incorporate white swans, ice sculptures, tiaras and 13 matching bridesmaids into her vision of her "perfect day".  None of that crap.  Although if I could get a swan wearing a tiara and a bridesmaid dress that would be kinda cool.  No, I am just talking about throwing a party since that is what a wedding is anyway.  A big-ass party with a quite serious moment at the start and as the impetus for the whole thing.  So really, the planning has been about cool favors, and fun ideas for invitations and table centerpieces and oh, the cake porn, the beautiful, magical cake porn.

If you have never flipped over the rock to peer into this underbelly of the wedding world you might have been as blown away as I was about the sheer number of products and services and websites and blogs devoted to all things wedding.  It is truly fascinating and I had no idea it was really this much of a giant wedding industrial machine.  Here are a few things I have learned so far:

  • THE coolest website for all things left of center regarding weddings is Offbeat Bride.  This site has some of the most creative weddings and ideas featured and it isn't all some little girls cupcakes and ponies and Prince Charming dream crap.  If you want to get ideas how to incorporate sci-fi themed centerpieces,or how to dress a transgendered bride, or about the hand-fasting ritual, or what tattooed brides do about their beloved tattos this is the site for you.  Even though none of the above are things I am concerned with it is still kind of interesting to read and digest.  What this site excels at, and to me its reason for being, is that it reassures you that the most important part of the ceremony and party is that it must feel authentic to you and the person you are marrying and it gives you ideas to send you down that route.
  • Offbeat Bride also gives the sage advice to not worry because no matter what you do someone will think it is tacky or ugly or stupid.  So don't worry about such things and just do what feels right. 
  • Knee-length wedding dresses are very hard to come by.  Are there seriously that few of us who don't want a long-white gown?  And yes, I used to think I would just get a pretty dress in some random color but I decided I wanted the dress to at least look like I was getting hitched.  I truly feel for the poor women who want sleeves, particularly long-sleeves.  You guys are truly screwed.
  • There are a whole lot of crazy women out there.  Dip your toe into the boards on sites like TheKnot and you will see what I mean.  Really ladies, let's chill out and remember why you are doing this in the first place. 
  • I love cupcakes but if I see one more cupcake tower at a wedding I will scream.  Also, the everybody wear a fake mustache things for the ceremony or in the photo booth is not funny and in fact veers to creepy.  Stop it already, please.
I am also lucky because I keep running into articles about how to get the groom more involved in the planning.  Kevin is having fun creating the website and meeting with the photographer and all of that stuff.  It is interesting because this process has revealed how few "normal" weddings I have been to and how few "unusual" ones Kevin has attended.  I think it is an East Coast-West Coast thing but I could be wrong.  We keep having discussions about the wedding and he is definitely the one who envisions a  more traditional gathering and my vision is a little less normal.  Don't worry, no actual fighting occurs but it is interesting to see a different interpretation of weddings than my own.

Now, if you will excuse me I have to go read about a Moroccan/burlesque themed broom jumping or some such thing...


Kath said...

Yay, party planning! I'm glad you're finding some alternative wedding resources. : )

aeep said...

ever since I helped plan my sister;s wedding in 03 I have been an indie/DIY wedding blog reader. I love reading the creative and fun ways that couples express who they are. People do such neat things to honor their families, their relationships, their aesthetic POV. Plus I like pretty things.

M saw them in my google reader acct in our first months...I wonder what his thoughts were. Which is funny cause I totally could never picture myself as a player in one of these grand events, just liked being a voyeur